Friday 27 June 2008

The Forgotten Theories of Science

I've never been a science-person. That goes to say I was pretty much an average kid through school. But I turned out okay in life by understanding the basic concepts behind all the boring theories and equations. There's always logic hidden in them. Somewhere. It's how you interpret it really, or rather how you comprehend it.

Like Physics. It's a pretty complex thing in my head. I don't get much of it. Especially stuff about time and distance. How much would a car have travelled in 15hrs and 14 minutes if it travels at 3.7 miles per hour? Who knows? And honestly I don't care! These car questions really annoyed me in school, I didn't even drive then! I couldn''t care less. But anyways, here's what I really understand about science and how it's lived daily. Trust me these are the real theories, they don't teach it in schools, but you will know what I am talking about! There's some biology thrown in there with chemistry as well!!!

  • The last few portions of a distance you are covering to see someone you love a lot are always the fastest. There is this building anticipation that drives you to walk faster, makes your heart beat faster and makes your stomach churn with excitement you've never felt before.
  • 4 hours with someone you enjoy being with = 4 seconds
  • The further you are from someone for a longer period of time, the more you start appreciating their company.
  • The speed at which you talk should be = the speed at which you think.
  • When you are surrounded by discouraging people, your momentum decreases (they pull you down....gravity!)
  • When you are with people who understand your vision and dream, your momentum increases (they give you leverage)
  • Being too static all the time can make you become so solid that you can't be moulded. It's good to have mobility and potential energy at all times.
  • The longer you stay without forgiving someone, the further you will go away from them!
I can go on forever, but I don't want to steal Einstein's thunder. ;)

Wednesday 25 June 2008

We Are Who We Are

I don't want to do what I do
I do what I don't want to do
I want what I shouldn't want
I don't want what I should want
I break the rules and they break me
I draw outside the lines because the lines draw me there
I walk against the crowd but sometimes the crowd walks over me
I speak the truth and sometimes it speaks for me
I love without conditions but conditions don't favour me
I write with a passion for the benefit of others and
I writhe with a passion for the blessings of God
I struggle to let go and then miss all the struggle
I cry for the pain of others while others cry for theirs
I cry for my pain and others stand and watch
I laugh with my friends and my friends laugh at me
I dance and am happy but many people hate me
I don't care about my past, atleast I lived it
I wouldn't want to be you because then I'd not be me
I won't try to be you because I'm too trying so hard to be myself

I will be Me and you must be You
Let us be Us and them be Them
Don't let them change Us
We are who we are!

Thursday 19 June 2008

That thing we call love....

.....is it really Love?

When you like being around someone a lot and can't imagine a second without them by your side...is it love or is it need? a need to be with someone who makes you feel a certain way?

When you crave for someone with all your heart and want them to want you back as much, is that
love or is it a desire? A desire to possess, to have what you don't have any control over?

When you respect someone for the way they are and want to be just like them, when they are everything you'd ideally imagine yourself to be...is that love or is it adoration or worship in a way?

When someone adores you; thinks you're special, beautiful and worthy of love, you feel like you're perfect when you are with them, when you like what they make you feel like....is that love or is it a reciprocal of their love for you?

If, and that is a big IF, these are not what Love is.... what is love then?

Isn't it wanting to be around someone even when you can't stand them, when they irritate the living daylights out of you?

Isn't it wanting to be with someone even when they can't stand the sight of you, the smell of you, the whole of you?

Isn't it making that other person feel special about themselves although they may never make you feel special for making them feel special?

Isn't it forgiving someone a thousand times and still when they go and hurt you again, giving them yet another chance?

Isn't it respecting someone for their opinion and letting them say it although it kills you inside to know that you're right?

Isn't it compromising on your dreams every once in a while to accommodate the dreams of others, to take time of your mission to help others fulfil theirs?

Isn't love what God feels for us every minute of every day and what we chose not to feel for so many people around us?

If none of this is love, then I've never been in love and never ever will be!

Tuesday 17 June 2008

I'm quirky...live with it!

It's amazing how things that are absolutely normal to you and just a part of who you are, can seem so strange and awkward to someone else. And it's not until someone points out that you are different that you realise you are. We all are. We are so different and yet so similar.

I, for one, would like to believe there is just no one else like me. I mean, no one who can emote the way I do and I am beginning to believe this more strongly as others reinstate it.

Embracing our awkward habits, weird mannerisms, retarded behaviour and inexcusable thoughts is just one small step to loving ourselves more. If I don't love how different I am, I can't expect anyone to. If I don't love me, who will?

So anyways, all the gibberish aside let me get down to what I came here to do - make a list of those things you must know about me that I'd like to think are strange (pls tell me if you identify with any of these and I think we can be friends 'forever'):

  • I can cry bitterly feeling deep remorse and anxiety at one second and laugh at something terribly funny the very next moment. It's what I call my super human ability to change moods. Be sad, be happy, pretend to happy when I'm sad, pretend to be sad when I'm happy, cry bitterly when I feel like, cry when I don't feel like, cry when I want someone to feel sorry, laugh when I feel like crying and then pretend that the tears were tears of joy, laugh till I cry - literally...this list is never ending. I don't expect you to change moods like me, to be instantly resurrected out of one state into another like me.....but you can live with it when I do!
  • I spend unjustifiable hours imagining things in my head. Conversations. What you will say to me when I see you. What I will say back. What will not be said and how I will be fine with the silence. I rehearse my lines in my head and then look in the mirror and see how you'd see me when I say them. I swell anticipation at the smallest of incidents and something you said or did that probably never meant anything at all (literally) - still eats me day in and day out. I imagine what it would be being you. I imagine being in your body. I imagine myself in your clothes. I imagine plots for many books I intend to write. I imagine stories for many films I intend to direct. I imagine what I'd do if I couldn't imagine any more.
  • I dream. I dream when I sleep. I dream when I'm awake. When I sleep I see so many things that I write in a book and know for sure have meanings. Some don't have meanings. I still write them. I like to know the dreams of others but am sometimes afraid to ask. I believe in symbols in dreams. My dreams are what I am.
  • I set limits for myself and make everything a little competition for myself. I must reach the bus stop before the lady walking next to me or else I lose. I must walk till that pole before this taxi overtakes me or I lose. I must make you laugh at my joke or I lose. I must take a shower in 3 minutes or I lose. I must count how many steps I take from the bus stop home. If I miss, I must start again. If I am about to lose any of these competitions, I change the rules. I change the rules so that I can always win. And I always do.
  • I make lists. I make grocery lists, chore lists, money lists, receipts lists, bill lists, time table lists, birthday lists, calling lists, lists of lists and invest a lot of planning into anything before I execute it (if ever).
  • I dance a lot when I'm alone. Classical, R'n'B, exotic, crazy, freestyle, mystyle and futile.
  • I talk a lot. When you are not there, I talk to myself. I talk to animals I see from my window, I talk to characters from the books I read, I talk to movie stars, I talk to dolls, I talk to Jesus - most of the time.
  • I am tired writing now and I'm going to stop. But that's strange. Because the weirdest thing about me is that I never know when to stop. It's like I got made with no brakes on. I can't stop loving. I can't stop forgiving. I can't stop talking. I can't stop being crazy. I can't stop being me. Ok I have to stop writing now. STOP.
Oh. I think I forgot to mention this. 'You' in this post is every person I know and relate with every waking moment.

Monday 16 June 2008

The Rare Routine

Mundaneness fills my days
Like an overflowing vat to the brim
I float around this sea of people
It really helps to know to swim

Each passing week looks like the previous one
I sometimes scarcely even care
But I'm sure one day I will drown
In this busyness that is really a snare

So I got up this morning and said I will do
Something different every day, something new
I smiled at a stranger and winked at a child
I was touching some lives, I didn't have a clue

I lent a hand to a girl on the train
I made up a tune when I was still in bed
There wasn't a moment that I was tired or alone
I took down some notes and planned a day ahead!

I laughed when alone and thanked God I'm alive
To live my routine like it was really exciting
I'm sure I won't regret this a bit
And that's why I'm putting it in writing

So do what you may to make your boring day
A schedule that is interesting and fun
And if there are moments when you feel run down
Rhyme an inspiring poem, just like this one!

Wednesday 11 June 2008

Uyiren Uyire

It's confounding how all emotions and feelings cannot be summed up in a word or expressed fully in one particular language. I understand quite a few languages and I know by now that there are some words in some languages that mean so much more and say so much more that no amount of words in English would ever say well enough.

Like Tamil. Tamil is such a beautiful language. Apart from being one of the oldest languages and my mother tonuge, it is one of the most expressive languages. Now that I am getting to understand and learn the language more than I did before, I regret moments when I was younger and resented it. It's beautiful. I'd love to use phrases or words from Tamil that I know I could never convey the same meanings in English.

For example, 'Uyiren Uyire'! It's pronounced oo-yee-rin oo-yee-ray. The closest I can get to translating it in English would be 'the life of my life'! What a profound thing to call someone. THE LIFE OF MY LIFE. What an amazing way to express to someone how much they mean to you.

Like to God. To tell him that He is the Life of your life. The reason for your existence. Your raison d'ĂȘtre. The happy in your happiness, the glad in your gladness and the beauty in all things beautiful. He is the essence of life. Life is him. And Life is in you. So He is the Life in you. 'Uyiren Uyire'. Wow!!!

And how about saying that to your mother. Who concieved you. Inside whom you grew and formed and lived before you were alive, as it were, in this world! You are her. Your blood, your sinews, your bones, your skin, your eyes...everything you are is her! A piece of her. A bit of her that she was willing to let live outside her. She willed you to be alive. You are her decision. Her love for your father. The life that came out of her life. Uyiren Uyire.

It's amazing how people find more and more excuses to avoid telling people how they feel just because they say they can't find the words. There are never too few words to say to someone how you feel. It's just about finding the right emotions and telling them as they are...or better still...telling them in words that you make up yourself.

Get inspired. Make new words. Borrow words from other languages. Make history. So here I am - a normal working class 24-year old adding a new word to the english dictionary.

Uyiren Uyire (oo-yee-rin oo-yee-ray) n.
"The life of one's life", "The reason for one's being"

Sunday 1 June 2008

The Most Romantic Bible Passage

ZEPHANIAH 3: 14-20

14 Sing, O Daughter of Zion;
shout aloud, O Israel!

Be glad and rejoice with all your heart,

O Daughter of Jerusalem!

15 The LORD has taken away your punishment,
he has turned back your enemy.
The LORD, the King of Israel, is with you;
never again will you fear any harm.

16 On that day they will say to Jerusalem,
"Do not fear, O Zion;
do not let your hands hang limp.

17 The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing."

18 "The sorrows for the appointed feasts
I will remove from you;
they are a burden and a reproach to you.

19 At that time I will deal
with all who oppressed you;
I will rescue the lame
and gather those who have been scattered.
I will give them praise and honor
in every land where they were put to shame.

20 At that time I will gather you;
at that time I will bring you home.
I will give you honor and praise
among all the peoples of the earth
when I restore your fortunes
before your very eyes,"
says the LORD.