The Sushification of the world!

I know I've attempted dividing people into two types on this blog before; but I've decided to redo it.

All famous philosophers must divide people into two 'types', and so why not me?

Forget my previous two types. After much thought and careful reconsideration, I've decided that there are, in fact, just these two types of people:

1. Those who love sushi i.e. those who rock, and

2. Those who hate sushi i.e. those who are soon going to disappear from the face of the earth!

You don't have to agree with me, although I'm always right about things like this. It's just obvious that whoever invented sushi was one heaven of a genius. Whoever thought of yummy fish wrapped in rice and a leaf, ha? What a genius! What forward thinking, I say! So convenient, too!

Here in South India, we have to go through so much pain to eat fish and rice.

1. Place one mountain of rice on your plate.

2. Pour fish curry on the rice.

3. Mix the two together till the two become one (like in marriage).

4. Then make one big ball of rice and fish with your hand.

5. Now eat that ball.

6. Feel good.

7. Repeat the above several times.

8. Wash hands thoroughly.

A long, unwanted, painstaking process is what it is!

Now take Sushi, on the other hand. It is fish already wrapped in rice, and sometimes in a leaf, that you can buy in a take-away box. Here's how you eat it:

1. Open the box and eat the Sushi.

2. Feel good.

SIMPLE! I wish all things in life were as simple as Sushi. In fact, I think they should add sushi in the dictionary as a synonym for 'easy' or 'simple'. It could sound cool, too!

He: Hey, did you check my new phone?

She: Yeah, it's user friendly, man!

He: I know, so unbelievably sushi to navigate!

Wouldn't that make sense? I'm going to campaign for this to be added to the English dictionary outside the Oxford library or Merriam Webster's house, or wherever it is that they make dictionaries. I know some people will oppose this motion but they're the ones who hate sushi i.e. those who are soon going to be extinct.

Just to illustrate my point, I've made a list of things that are as unbelievable as not liking sushi. The chances that sushi haters will survive are as unlikely as the following:

1. Obama saying something that's not politically correct.
2. Indian hockey players being in any TV commercial.
3. India TV reporting something that is actually news.
4. Rajat Sharma not oiling his hair.
5. Rakhi Sawant saying something that she actually means.
6. Rakhi Sawant not saying anything for once.
7. Karan Johar making a good film.
8. Me watching cricket and enjoying it.
9. Me watching any sport and enjoying it.
10. You thinking that this blog is uninteresting (how impossible is that!).

I think you get the point! Sushi rocks and my theory is that those who don't like it will soon disappear. I call it the "Survival of the sushiest!"